I’m not sure exactly why I watched Bride Wars. It didn’t look like my cup of tea at all. I believe it was that my sisters loved it, although one of them also loved Twilight, so that should have been a big warning there.
Wars follows the story of lifelong best friends Liv (Kate Hudson) and Emma (Anne Hathaway) whose boyfriends propose around the same time. From childhood, they both dreamed of having their weddings at the Plaza Hotel, and initially they get dates several weeks apart through wedding co-ordinator Marion St. Claire (Candice Bergen). However, though a mistake of St. Claire’s secretary, they end up getting booked on the same day at the same time. Both women are determined to have their dream wedding, which includes having each other as maid of honour. Neither are willing to give up their place at the highly-coveted Plaza.
They initially try to get the other to back down and accept somewhere less ‘perfect’ and when that fails, they engage in guerrilla warfare to sabotage the other’s wedding. Liv sabotages Emma and her fiancé’s dance lessons and poaches the band she knew Emma had her heart set on; Emma sabotages Liv’s diet by sending her baskets of calorie-loaded goodies (and what’s with this ‘you don’t alter Vera Wang to fit the girl; you alter the girl to fit Vera Wang’ claptrap?) and adds blue dye to her blond rinse. They both planned on having the other as maid-of-honour, but they have to resort to work colleagues that they don’t have much rapport with: Emma chooses a selfish, boozing woman who always dumps her problems on Emma, even during Emma’s wedding; Liv, her I-Thought-They-Weren’t-Allowed-Such-Stereotypes-About-Gay-Men-Anymore-Gay-Assistant. Yep, they’d both rather have maids of honour they don’t get along with than instead of, I dunno, put their friendship above a freaking wedding.
It culminates with Liv replacing the montage of Emma and her fiancé that was intended for their walk down the aisle with a montage of Emma in various drunken states (though to give what passes as credit in this movie, Liv does have a change of heart at the last minute, and it’s her bitchy-to-the-hilt gay assistant/bridesmaid that disregards Liv’s orders). Emma then charges into Liv’s wedding and the two have a brawl on the floor of the wedding aisle, satin and tulle flying.
I swear, I am not making this up. Someone actually made a movie about two otherwise close, long-time friends who turned into bridezillas who tried to sabotage each other’s wedding out of – what, I don’t know. After it had been established that neither of them was giving up their spot, what was sabotage going to achieve? Nothing, I think, except to say that the most intelligent, loyal of women becomes a crazy, vengeful bitch when it comes to her wedding… and that this is funny.
Thankfully, Emma realises that she wasn’t really in love with her fiancé, that they had been in love with the people they had once been, not the people they were today. She and Liv have a heart-to-heart, make up, Liv’s wedding goes ahead and they dance at the reception, both in their (by now somewhat tattered) wedding dresses. Am I alone in thinking that if my best friend had proved themselves capable of such sabotage of a dream of mine (say, a round-the-world trip, which takes about as much money and planning as these dream weddings seem to), I probably wouldn’t want to speak to them again, let alone have made up and be BFFs again hours after the final act of sabotage?
But wait, it gets better. Cut to a year later, and Emma is married to Liv’s brother. They’re both pregnant and hey, isn’t that cute, they’ll have little girls who will be life-long best friends. Yuck. Emma went from leaving a guy at the altar to being married and pregnant to someone else a year later. Most people – or at least I hope so – do a lot of soul-searching after taking such a big step as walking away from a long-term relationship and engagement… they don’t go and get hitched to someone a year later. But that’s not the point, see? The point is that now Liv and Emma are really-and-truly sisters (at least in-laws) and they’ll have two little girls who’ll be BFFs just like them.
So here we have a movie that has childhood best friends who tear each other apart over their dream wedding, act like it never happened after months of sabotage, and a woman who’s walking down the aisle with one man and married to another a year later… and that all of this is somehow funny.