Choose Your Three Bodyguards

A few years ago, there was a questionnaire circling about who would you chose as your bodyguard (including fictional). The three choices that kept coming back were Sarah Conner, Ellen Ripley and Vasquez. So I’m going to put a feminist twist on it: choose three women you would choose to fight side-by-side with. It can be book, film, tv, anime, manga, any other media that’s there. If she exists outside your imagination and you can justify it , she counts.

The Rules: No-one from the Terminator or Alien series. Sorry, but too obvious.

My pick:

1. Ellie Linton from John Marsden’s Tomorrow series. The girl is a teenage MacGyver. She makes bombs out of the bits and pieces she finds lying around.

2. Minerva McGonagall from the Harry Potter series. I know it sounds odd, but at one point in Deathly Hallows, she’s all ‘get your shit together, Voldemort is coming’.

3. Gina ‘Mother’ Newman, from Matthew Reilly’s Scarecrow series. Mother is short for motherfucker. She’s faced killer whales, rats to her face, terrorists from pretty much every country in the world. (Apart from Reilly’s Australia. We have no terrorists, no sireee.)  They all died. She lived.

So let me know what you think. I’d love to compile a list of kick-ass females that doesn’t involve Aliens or Terminator.


  1. says

    Is Hermione Granger too obvious? That girl knows everything and she’s not afraid to use it. If she was out, I’d accept Valentine Wiggin from Ender’s Game as a suitable replacement.

    I’ll also take Kate Austin from Lost and Nanami from Suikoden II, even though both of them can be annoying as hell.

  2. Mintywolf says

    Utena from Shoujo Kakumei Utena. If she’s fighting for what she believes in, even in the face of a thousand swords raining down on her, she will not stop.

    Fiona, from Burn Notice. She’s afraid of absolutely nothing, and always has all the weapons you’d need. And if she doesn’t, she can make them out of common household items.

    River Song from Doctor Who. She’s just plain awesome.

  3. says

    1. Alanna of Trebond from The Song of the Lioness by Tamora Pierce. Because she is hardcore and tells it straight, which is my kind of woman.

    2. Samantha Carter from Stargate SG-1. Because she solves problems intelligently but can kick arse when need be.

    3. Granny Weatherwax from Terry Pratchett’s Discworld. I’m not sure I could fight alongside Granny Weatherwax because I would be too intimidated! But on the plus side she would ‘headology’ the pants off anyone we were fighting!!

  4. Dina Bow says

    I’d pick
    1. Genkai from Yu Yu Hakusho. Seriously, she’s an awesome fighter even in old age and she is very wise.
    2.The Powerpuff girls. If I have to pick one it would be Buttercup because she has super speed and laser vision.
    3. Maka from Soul Eater. She defeated the big bad with bravery and her bare fists.
    If had to go into a zombie infested graveyard to defeat my evil twin who so happens to be a necromancer with Dracula as a body guard, this would be the team I bring with me.

  5. goshawk says

    I love the “Tomorrow” series, seriously. So awesome.

    Gunnery Sergeant Torin Kerr from Tanya Huff’s “Valor” series. I could tell you all about how she defeated the army of big angry sentient lizards to make the species want to join the Confederation, or about her outsmarting a giant smart-plastic alien entity, or single-handedly taking down a huge space-piracy organisation, or the toughness, or the sense of humour (always a plus in life-or-death situations!). But really? She’s a gunny. What else do I need to say?

    Alianne (Aly) of Pirate’s Swoop, Spymistress, from Tamora Pierce’s “Trickster” duology. Mostly because she is SNEAKY SNEAKY SMART, though she’s also wicked good with a pair of knives, and can see magic and poison. While it’s all very well to have big fierce warriors, who doesn’t want a woman who can make your enemies start fighting each other with a clever campaign of misinformation, or tell you if there’s a curse on that shiny red apple?

    Olivia Dunham, from Fringe. She’s badass, she has investigative skills and the resources of the FBI at her fingertips, and she’s a Cortexefan kid (which I’ll leave unspoiled for those who haven’t seen it yet, which, if you are one, what are you doing reading this stupid comment, go watch Fringe right now). Also it seems like she’d be really chill to hang out with.

    Actually, I can see all of these people getting along okay, even Aly (though the other two might get bored of being teased), which is a good thing to consider.

  6. Gabriella says

    Nah, I figured that they count so long as you can justify and it doesn’t come from the Terminator or Alien series. I actually wrote an article about the women of Harry Potter last year, and done again, I wouldn’t include them, although I thought Maggie Smith brought something really special to the role in DH PtII. (‘Boom!’ ‘I always wanted to use that spell!’ ‘His name is Voldemort, Filius, you may as well use it, he’s going to try and kill you either way’.. yeah, OK, I spend FAR too much time watching these movies…)

  7. says

    I second every recommendation I actually know here, but I think I can come up with three that haven’t been mentioned.

    1. Mara Jade from the Timothy Zahn Star Wars novels. Trained by the Emperor – she fights equally well physically or psychologically, and I think she and I have pretty much identical attitudes and outlooks.

    2. Sandra Pullman from New Tricks. As a cop, she fights more psychologically than physically, but her ability to size people up and figure out what’ll stop them in their tracks is just too valuable to do without.

    3. Sydney Bristow. Without even being armed, she can defend herself and take out enemies. Plus, she really thinks on her feet and has ridiculous amounts of combat experience.

  8. LarrydaLaptop says

    Only 3? That’s a shame. I’ll have to choose wisely, then! Hmm…

    1. Blossom from The Powerpuff Girls. She’s a natural leader, a child prodigy in math and science, and she’s highly dedicated to doing good. She also has over 20 superpowers. Super Strength, Super Speed, Flight, Ice Breath, Shrinking, Duplication, Heat Vision, Enhanced Senses…The list goes on.

    2. Sari Sumdac from Transformers Animated (Third Season. She was lovable in the first 2 seasons, but wasn’t battle-worthy until the upgrade of her hidden inner circuitry). Though impulsive, she’s also extremely brave and loyal.
    Because of her techno-organic nature, Sari have enhanced strength, and can decipher the inner workings of any machine just by touching it. This ability will even work on broken or incomplete machines, as they will “tell” her what they need to work. Oh, and those same hands can shoot spheres of energy.

    3. Cynthia from the Pokemon series. She doesn’t have any super powers, but she is calm, wise, and supportive. As the champion trainer, she’s well-versed in battle strategy. Those Pokemon of hers, all but 1 female themselves, boast elemental powers unmatched throughout the game.
    (Choosing Cynthia may be cheating, though. It technically breaks the number limit and the criteria of only female bodyguards. Then again, the Pokemon are basically acting as an extension of her will and represent her hard-earned training credit. Thoughts?)

    Sorry about the wall of text, but those would be my choices. I feel safer already!

  9. Gabriella says

    I love the “Tomorrow” series, seriously. So awesome.

    I know! And I find Ellie to be very realistic. I mean, I know jack about living in the bush, farm life etc but through all ten books I found myself nodding and thinking ‘yes, I can see someone with her upbringing doing that in that scenario’. Don’t get me wrong, I love mother precicely for how OTT badass Mother is, but sometimes it’s all ‘oh, look, ANOTHER overwhelming obstacle where she’ll wipe the floor with the opposition’.

  10. Korva says

    1. Granny Weatherwax (Terry Pratchett’s Discworld). This old lady is tough as nails, smart, unafraid of pretty much everything, and probably has the strongest will of any character I know. Plus, the headology. Though, yes, she can be quite intimidating even when you’re on her side, but that’s part of her charm. 😉

    2. Jaheira (Baldur’s Gate series). She’s a half-elven fighter and druid, a member of the Harpers (a group of dedicated do-gooders, basically). On top of being brave, fierce, smart and out-spoken, she remains loyal and dedicated to her beliefs and cause even through immense losses.

    3. Pippi Longstockings (Astrid Lindgren). Yes, she’s a little kid and yes, her being from childrens’ stories mean she wouldn’t do so well in a real fight. But I had to mention her because when I was a little girl desperately looking for role models in a world that told me women were, almost without exception, stupid, vain, naggy, needy, annoying, shallow, afraid of everything, weak, incompetent and thoroughly unwanted, she was just about the only character that stood out as anything but. She’s literally strong enough to lift her horse with several people sitting on it, completely independent and cheerfully determined to remain so, generous, brave and adventurous. In a fight, she can just chuck people into a tree or out a window, or tie knots into their weapons.

    I’d have loved to nominate the original Tyrande Whisperwind from WarCraft, but what Blizzard did with and to her ever since her introduction utterly mangled, gutted and destroyed everything that made me and many others love her.

  11. Maartje says

    1 Aeryn Sun, a soldier since well- birth, recently learned to think for herself. Also shooting makes her feel better 😀

    2 Buffy Summers for obvious reasons

    3 Nikita, haven’t seen the new version but the old one could kick ass and take names and is really loyal to the people she cares about.

    If I could appoint a leader for our little fightin’ outfit it would be Devon Adair from Earth 2. Smart, optimistic and gets things done.

  12. SunlessNick says

    Fight side by side with, or hide behind, because all these women would be incalculably more badass than me.

    But that aside, and trying not to duplicate any suggestions:

    Helen Magnus from Sanctuary: Centuries of experience; fighter, investigator, and superscientist.

    Tara Chace from Greg Rucka’s Queen and Country: Superspy and all round hardass.

    Paige Winterbourne from Women of the Otherworld: Another investigator, and a witch.

    I could see them working together, although Tara might get exasperated with Paige from time to time.

  13. M.C. says

    1. Rose Hathaway from the Vampire Academy series. This is a really obvious choice because Rose has been trained to become a bodyguard since her childhood. She’s smart, super strong and 100% dedicated to protecting the people she feels responsible for.

    2. Brienne of Tarth from A Song of Ice and Fire. Not only is she tall, strong and a skilled fighter, but also is she the most honourable and stubborn woman ever. If she promises to protect you, she’s going to do it, even if she hates your guts, even if she has to sacrifice everything she holds dear in order to fulfill her vow.

    3. Bo from Lost Girl. She has unique magical powers, knows how to use any weapon and used to be a professional barkeeper before she started fighting evil. Bo’s usual method of protecting someone is: inviting you to crash on her sofa while she uses some clever trick to get rid of the people who are after you and then take you out for drinks.

    Yep, that’s my choices. Also, I think my 3 bodyguards would get along great together. They have very different personalities yet share some similarities like defying social norms so that they can stay true to themselves.

  14. says

    Off the top of my head? Olivia Dunham from Fringe, Wonder Woman, and Mattie from True Grit. (The remake.)

    First runner up is Eowyn from LOTR. We’d be a very driven group.

  15. Copper says

    Hmm… If we can only have 3, I think I’ll make a nice balanced team of a melee fighter, a ranged fighter and a (incredibly badass) healer – what can I say, I’m a gamer at heart!

    1. Balsa from Moribito: Guardian of the Spirit. A spear for hire, she’s devoted herself to saving lives to make up for her past sins – she’s honourable, intelligent and she never, ever gives up. Also, it’s nice for once to see a physically strong woman who’s actually allowed to have some muscles on her. You can really BELIEVE that she can take on four elite assassins with a broken weapon and WIN ->

    2. Homura from Madoka. She chooses to become a magical girl in a world where they exist just to be beaten down (I won’t elaborate any more than that because holy spoilers!). She watches her best friend/possible lover die over and over and over again and never gives up hope or stops trying to save her, so I would definitely want her on my side in a fight. It also helps that she has time manipulation powers, and is pretty handy with bombs and machine guns. (If you want to see a show all about teenage girls being amazing and Fighting The Patriarchy – or at least that’s how I choose to interpret it – go watch Madoka!)

    3. Sharla from Xenoblade Chronicles, because when things go down you want someone who can patch you up again C: She’s an experienced battle medic, one of the last survivors of her destroyed hometown, and so so fierce! (Facing down a massive robotic monstrosity, “I won’t stop until I’ve scrapped every last one of you!” AWESOME.)

  16. sbg says

    1. Kono Kalakaua from the H50 reboot. In what is generally a wasteland of bad writing but pretty, PRETTY scenery (landscape and human), Kono is smart, loyal, cool under pressure and can demonstrably kick butt.

    2. Seconding Olivia Dunham. I <3 her so, she needs to be listed more than once anyway.

    3. Ziva David, NCIS. Yes, she leans toward being Practically Perfect In Every Possible Way, but there is zero doubt that she can more than handle herself while handling pretty much everyone else at the same time.

  17. says

    Andrea Nash from the Kate Daniels series by Ilona Andrews. She’s a sharpshooter with gun or crossbow for ranged attacks, can transform into a hyena monster for melee attacks, and is very good at quoting laws and rulebooks to stop from the fight from starting in the first place. (My first impulse was Kate herself – but while Kate does more damage, she’s definitely not a team player.)

    Torin Kerr from the Confederation series by Tanya Huff, for all the reasons goshawk listed, but also: she’s equally good at taking orders and giving them. Essential for proper teamwork.

    Cordelia Naismith Vorkosigan, from the Vorkosigan Saga by Lois McMaster Bujold. Starts out as a scientist, gets drafted into a makeshift military, ends two wars, raises a child-emperor, and settles into a quiet retirement as the Vicereine of an entire planet. She’d be a formidable foe at any point during her life.

  18. says

    I just wanted to mention that this has been a really fun thread that also shows there are a lot more kick-ass female characters out there than any one of us could think of quickly. Any interest in future threads like this? Ones aimed at naming smart women character, or female characters we feel we could be “buddies” with (since women are too envious and catfighting to do the buddy thing, ya know)?

  19. M.C. says

    Jennifer Kesler:
    Any interest in future threads like this? Ones aimed at naming smart women character, or female characters we feel we could be “buddies” with (since women are too envious and catfighting to do the buddy thing, ya know)?

    Or how about: You’re stranded on a deserted island, you can choose 3 women to come with you and help you survive/escape.

  20. iiii says

    Modesty Blaise. She’s all cute and tiny, can kick anyone’s ass at hand-to-hand combat, and can (and will!) turn anything into a weapon.

    Star Svensdottir, from Dana Stabenow’s books. A Valkyrie wielding a Louisville Slugger who can build and run her own space colony.

    Granny Weatherwax. What they said upthread.

    Maid (sort of), mother, and crone: among them they could meet and defeat any sort of enemy. And (imo) they’d work well together, despite each of them being used to sole command – they’ve all shown respect for the expertise and ideas of others.

    I wouldn’t want to fight alongside them so much as I’d want to fetch them iced tea and made them sandwiches while they dismissed me as cargo and did the heavy lifting. I’m not much in a fight.

  21. Gabriella says

    Jennifer Kesler,

    Totally.How about women you’d want around in a disaster?

    Or interesting women you’d invite to a dinner party…

    I can’t believe how much fun we’ve had on this thread (or how good people have been about contributing someone new once someone’s said something). I’ve got to get to work, but I’m going to think about this and hopefully have another choose-your-three-type-post ready for next week.

    Also, can’t believe no-one (including myself) thought of Xena. Does she really need an explaination?

  22. says


    Whoa, yes, Xena. And Gabrielle, by later seasons. Where was my mind??? And then there were some baddies on Xena you wouldn’t mind having on side if you could be sure of their loyalty: Callisto, Alti… eh, it’s been a while, but that show was pretty full of women who’d make excellent body guards.

  23. SarahSyna says

    1. The female version of Commander Shepard from the Mass Effect games. She’s the first, last and best hope for not only humanity, but all life in the galaxy, hell, she’s already saved all life from a race of homicidal, uber-powered machines.
    Granted, I would prefer Paragon (pure hero, reliance on persuasion and peaceful resolutions) over Renegade (anti-hero, snarky, aggressive, relies on intimidation), but no matter how you play Commander Shepard, she is an amazing badass. Plus, she’s finally getting the recognition she deserves, since FemShep is now going to be in the trailers as well as ManShep.

    2. Bayonetta from the game of the same name.
    She may be overly-sexualised, but she’s snarky, elegant, confident and kicks so much ass it’s practically unholy. She can destroy abominations with dragons and giant limbs made out of her own hair. As far as ‘feminine weapons’ (how her creator described it) go, that is seriously epic.

    3. Karin Murphy from the Dresden Files.
    I have a weakness for ‘cute bruisers’, and so far (I’ve read up to Turn Coat) she is a really good one. She’s realistically affected by trauma, while still being as hard as nails when needed, is loyal, and is just a damn good person. She’s comparable to Paragon FemShep in my eyes; a good person who will get the job done and save as many lives as possible while doing so.

  24. Finbarr Ryan says

    kira nerys from deep space nine. former resistance fighter, complete badass, and someone who’s made a career out of overcoming overwhelming odds. i consider her the strongest character on the series, whether as a fighter, as a leader, or, hell, ethically.

    the boss from metal gear solid 3. in a series with vampires and psychics and super soldiers of all kinds she’s the one who every character looks up to as the ultimate badass, and she’s earned this reputation without a single silly supernatural power.

    zoe washburne from firefly. just… so awesome. totally wish we’d gotten to see more of her.

  25. says

    Ooooh, Nerys!

    There are so many women mentioned in this thread that leave me going, “Why on earth didn’t she come to mind?”, LOL.

    For that matter, Jadzia Dax could hold her own sparring with a Klingon, so she’d certainly come in handy in a pinch.

    Someone else I thought of today: Louise McCloud from Young Riders. She’s plenty competent in a gun fight, but almost more importantly, she absolutely will not give up and has a sense of justice a mile wide.

  26. Gabriella says

    Jennifer Kesler:
    Ooooh, Nerys!

    There are so many women mentioned in this thread that leave me going, “Why on earth didn’t she come to mind?”, LOL.

    Like Starbuck-reverse-engineer-an-alien-spaceship-and-fly-it-home from the remake of Battlestar Galactica. For that matter, the entire female cast from that show.

  27. Lika says


    SQUEE! Balsa! That’s awesome someone else know about her. She’s my top pick for bodyguard. Totally agree, I love that she has muscles that looks like she could take down several guys. She inspired me to hit the gym not to slim down, but to look strong and ripped. She’s also a calm, smart, highly capable and competent person.

    My other two picks are Xena and River Song.

  28. M.C. says

    My other two picks are Xena and River Song

    Aren’t you afraid River would abandon you and let you die as soon as her Only Reason For Existence (aka the Doctor) calls her away? Never trust a woman who would let the whole universe disintegrate because to her that’s better than being without her man.

  29. Dani says

    Jennifer Kesler:
    Any interest in future threads like this? Ones aimed at naming smart women character, or female characters we feel we could be “buddies” with (since women are too envious and catfighting to do the buddy thing, ya know)?

    Absolutely! It’s nice to be reminded of all of these awesome female characters.

    Here’s my 3:

    Annie Walker from Covert Affairs: She’s a CIA agent who’s good at her job (and she loves it; can I mention how much I LOVE hearing a female character assert that she’s skilled at and enjoys a job that’s not considered feminine – in this case, a spy – but not the sexy kind). Also, if, after completing an assignment, she feels as if something is not right, she will make it right, even if that means going against orders.

    I’m going to second Balsa from Seirei no Moribito: I think the youtube link Copper posted says plenty about her fighting abilities and a lot about her courage and commitment to seeing her job through to the end (in that scene, she purposely takes the shot to the stomach so she can deliver an even more lethal blow to her opponent.). She’s also incredibly intelligent and also has a wealth of experience that she relies on; what’s more, she is not about needless slaughter or violence for violence’s sake. And, like others have mentioned, seeing a female lead who’s ripped is awesome 😀

    Yoko from The 12 Kingdoms: She goes through a lot throughout the course of the series, and not only has to fight her way through a lot of situations, but has to learn empathy, the meaning of justice, and the value of asserting herself and not being a puppet. She starts out as the ultimate people-pleaser and becomes an Empress with the potential to be one of the greatest rulers in all of the 12 Kingdoms. She is also a good strategist, and knows when to bide her time and when to fight.

  30. Maria says

    I’d want… Rifkind — she’s blessed by the goddess, peeps!

    Sinderian from A Dark Star Rising
    ‎”When you meet Sinderian Faelloneos, observe her well, for then you will be privileged to see the most gifted young wizard of her generation… [Her teachers] let her go off at an early age to break her heart on the battlefields of Rhethun, leaving all her other talents lying fallow.”

    And Camilla n’ha Kyria –> she won’t use her magic, but she’s a brave, dedicated fighter

  31. Patrick McGraw says

    Lots of the choices that pop into my head have already been mentioned: Aeryn Sun, Cordelia Naismith Vorkosigan, Buffy Summers, Ziva David, Wonder Woman…

    So in the interests of adding to the discussion, I’ll pick three that haven’t been mentioned yet:

    Paksenarrion Dorthansdotter from Elizabeth Moon’s The Deed of Paksenarrion series. Paks is very driven, bright, and compassionate, and will not stand for injustice. She’s a great hero well before she becomes a paladin.

    Hawkgirl (Shayera Hol) from the DCAU. She’s an amazing tactician and fighter, and she’s also very snarky and good company.

    Scarlett (Shana O’Hara) from G.I. Joe (the Marvel comics continuity). She’s a counter-intelligence officer who became one of the most effective members of an elite team drawn from the best the entire US military has to offer. Plus, she has ninja training. You always need someone with ninja training.

  32. Lika says


    Aren’t you afraid River would abandon you and let you die as soon as her Only Reason For Existence (aka the Doctor) calls her away?

    Younger River, yes. Older River of Forest of the Dead and Time of Angels, I’d personally say no. You do have a point about the Doctor being Her Only Reason For Existence, which I did rant about. I do think who she matures to become is someone I want to fight on my team, but you’re right, River from Let’s Kill Hitler to The Wedding of River Song isn’t someone I want on my side.

    I admit, she is a contraversial choice, especially since Moffatt decided to Mary Sue the hell out of her and make her entire life revolve completely around the doctor, but the way her character came off the screen and particularly the intelligence and assurance Alex Kingston protrays her with is still enough for me to say that Older River from the earlier episode kicks ass and I’d fight with that River any day.

  33. Lika says

    Okay, in light of the fact that River is an iffy choice, I’ll choose Izumi Curtis from Fullmetal Alchemist instead. She’s a more solid choice ^_^ (It was a hard choice between Izumi and Olivia Armstrong, I tell you. FMA has awesome female characters.)

  34. katymol says

    Can I second Helen Magnus especially if I swing Ashley as well as a two for one
    I’d also want Ro Laren competent tough all sorts of courage and would tell me if I was being stupid.
    I’d also want Storm.
    (You’re making me greedy now but I really wish there had been more than one Doctor Who story with Brigadier Winifred Bambera as head of the British section of unit because she must have had a story worth hearing as well as being incredibly tough)

  35. says


    I think you did a nice job explaining how you chose River Song. It’s like Sam Carter on SG-1 – she was written very inconsistently, and sometimes the writers made her look very foolish, but I would second the choice to have her on my team because overall she’s awesome in many many ways.

  36. M.C. says


    I guess I know what you’re saying, but I still wouldn’t trust River to have my back. I mean, it’s not her fault. Obviously her parents are to blame, who are some of the worst parents imaginable – who the fuck lets their kid be raised by terrorists thinking “She’ll probably turn out alright”?!

    Anyway, if I had to choose a bodyguard from the Whoverse, that would be Sarah Jane Smith. She’s smart, trustworthy, resourceful, has alot of cool useful gadgets and knows many powerful people.

    • Maria says

      I keep getting River Song mixed up with Firefly River, and was really confused — why would Simon call River away from a job? If anything he’d be proud of her.

  37. Maartje says

    Oh, I’m becoming greedy as well! I want Marguerite Krux (sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s The Lost World) on my team as well! She isn’t a strong hand-to-hand fighter but is well trained in gun, rifle and whip and manages pretty well with sword and or any weapon handy (pots and pans if need be). She is hella smart, was a triple agent in WWI and speaks and reads every language she has come across so far. And, though she professes to be greedy and disloyal, her actions have actually proven her to be very loyal (and greedy).

    And I want B’Elanna Torres, she’s good as a fighter on account of her training and strength, very smart and dedicated… But well, mostly I would want her on my team so I could have a good conversation with her. She was featured waaaaaay too little even though she was one of the most interesting characters on that ship.

    Oh! And Chris Kelly (Pacific Blue), even in a mostly t&a show she still impressed me as a very capable woman who can fight, shoot, stand for justice etc she was loyal, didn’t put up with crap and didn’t stick around waiting for her One True Love, but dated around and generally had her own life aside from men (which is an accomplishment in any show, let alone a t&a show!)

  38. says


    Ooooh, Sarah Jane!!! I just watched S4, and it was so sad. There was more death stuff and less exploding slime alien stuff, and combined with Elisabeth Sladen’s real life death, it was just very bittersweet for me.

    But I’d totally rely on her to have my back.


    Thank god it wasn’t just me, HAHAHA! I did the same thing!

  39. Lika says

    Maria, Jennifer Kesler,

    Too funny! If I hadn’t had Doctor Who on my mind, I’d be wondering why why Simon would call River away too.


    I mean, it’s not her fault. Obviously her parents are to blame, who are some of the worst parents imaginable – who the fuck lets their kid be raised by terrorists thinking “She’ll probably turn out alright”?!

    Her parents did not let her be raised by terrorists. There no “letting” of any kind. River was very clearly kidnapped from them, and from the breathless way Amy asked the doctor at the beginning of “Let’s Kill Hitler” if he found her daughter, she wanted to find and get her baby back. She certainly wasn’t thinking that “my baby will probably turn out alright.” Don’t forget her little speech to Madame K. where Amy succinctly said, “you took my baby away and you hurt her.”

    I don’t blame Rory or Amy at all for what happened to River. I blame the terrorists who stole her away from her parents and tried to control and fashion her into a tool for them to use. Rory and Amy were just as much victims as River was.

    And I actually do think every questionable decision or poor reasoning for her decisions is River‘s own fault, regardless of her upbringing, and I’m aware of why it’s not the best idea to have someone who would sacrifice her regenerations and the universe for man to have my back. But she matured from that shallow and narrow-minded person into the knowledgeable and capable ass-kicker who I adored, and IMO, never showed signs she’d flake out and leave me to die if we were in fight after that.

    I haven’t seen much of Sarah Jane Smith except from the new Who series, where she kicked butt, but I heard she’s awesome :) I’ll definitely have to check out the Sarah Jane Smith Adventures!

    Jennifer Kesler,

    I know what you mean about a character being written inconsistently and the writers making her make foolish mistakes. It’s interesting how some characters seem to have a separate, uh, “self” for lack of a better word, from what their writers/creators, and I’ll attribute certain actions and decision to the writer(s) and not the character. River Song is exactly like that for me. As much I say that all her questionable decisions and reasoning are her own fault, I’m more annoyed with the writer than the character. I’m not yelling, “River, why are you being so dense?” at the TV, but rather, “Moffatt (the writer/creator), why are you making her so dense?”

    I’ve seen about a season and half of SG-1, and I want Sam Carter on my team as well, even with the inconsistent character writing I know is coming up. There are indeed many, many awesome things about her, and they all seem to manage to rise above gobs of dubious writing. I also think the acting helps a lot. Amanda Tapping and Alex Kingston are both able to embue the characters with a lot of a lot of admirable traits and strengths are is separate from the writing and makes me wish for better things for the characters when I’m shaking my head at what they’re doing.

  40. says


    Oh, I agree. The thing with SG-1 was, thanks to mediocre writing, everybody got to look foolish at least a few times by the end. It just felt like Sam got the worst of it, but maybe that’s because I was so enamored of her at first. I loved that she was a nerd, that she wasn’t a nurturer (and this wasn’t treated as something that needed to be fixed), that she LOVED her work… her combat skills were icing on the cake for me. :)

  41. M.C. says


    Her parents did not let her be raised by terrorists.There no “letting” of any kind.

    Of course they did. They had a space/time-machine at their disposal. After the events of LKH they could have used it to go back, rewrite history and rescue their daughter – just like the Doctor did in “The Girl Who Waited” or a million other times. But no, they just went on their way, having some fun adventures while their poor kid was being brainwashed somewhere in time.
    I’m sorry, but Rory and Amy are some of the worst fictional parents ever – even Darth Vader was a better father because he actually saved his son from being tortured.

  42. says


    No, Vader saw his chance to kill the Emperor and took it. Luke was just convenient. And then his narcissism led him to sucker Luke in during his dying moments so he’d feel/seem like a good guy in the end.

    That’s my genuine interpretation, and has been ever since I first saw the movie on opening day at the age of 10 and thought, “Rubbish – if only!” But it also serves to demonstrate that more than one interpretation of character motives is valid. :)

  43. Sabrina says

    1st) No Avatar yet? Fine, then I will pick Katara. Or Toph. I’d even take Korra and the series isn’t even out yet! These girls know their magic martial arts!

    2nd) Currently rewatching DS9 and Kira is also on top of my list. Dax is a close second. Speaking of space operas I’d also take Susan Ivanova from B5 to intimidate the shit out of my enemies:
    “Who am I? I am Susan Ivanova, Commander. Daughter of Andre and Sophie Ivanov. I am the right hand of vengeance and the boot that is going to kick your sorry ass all the way back to Earth, sweetheart! I am death incarnate, and the last living thing that you will ever see. God sent me. “

    3rd) Dana Scully cause she’s awesome and I kinda grew up with her as my heroine. Alternatively Temperance Brennan from Bones. Both are very intelligent women who can also kick some ass if the situation requires it (though admittedly Brennan would probably better in the ass-kicking department).

  44. Lika says

    Spoiler Warning: Contain spoilers for Doctor Who’s episode from “A Good Man Goes to War” onwards. I’m not sure the spoiler policy is here O.o but it just struck me that maybe I should have put a spoiler alert in my previous post.


    They had a space/time-machine at their disposal.

    Which they could have used to stop the Holocaust, The Killing Fields, and other atrocities. Would you say they were responsibility for not stopping mass genocide just because they had a space/time-machine? I guess you could argue fixed point in time, but how do you know that River/Melody’s abduction wasn’t a fixed point in time? It may have well been.

    Plus it was in LKH that they realized that their daughter Melody had grown up into River Song, and to go back to get Melody would be killing River (which was the whole point of The Girl Who waited. You can’t make a rescue in the past without killing the person of the present/future who wasn’t rescued. Unrescued!Amy of “The Girl Who Waited” even said that what they would be doing to her is murder if they made her and the 30+ years she suffered never existed.) I personally think Melody/River’s abduction was a fixed point in time that couldn’t be undone, so I’m relieved they were spared the dilemma of having to choose between rescuing Melody or killing the very human and very real person that is River Song.

    Her parents were in a shit spot and if they had any choices, which I don’t think they did, they were shit choices. Erasing River Song is was a shit choice. I refuse believe that being a shit spot with shit choices is “letting” of any kind.

  45. says

    I wasn’t a fan of the ‘Tomorrow’ stories because they were basically paranoid invasion literature that acted as right wing comfort food to Australian survivalists who think Indonesia is going to invade them.

  46. M.C. says

    Jennifer Kesler,

    That is an interesting interpretation. But why did Vader choose that particular moment to kill the Emperor? Why not smother him with a pillow while he’s asleep? At least that way Vader wouldn’t have died too…

    I mean, I’m not saying Vader was a good father. He was not James from Once Upon A Time, who willingly sacrificed himself so that his daughter may live and actually smiled while bleeding to death because he knew he had managed to get his child to safety.

    I’m just saying that Vader was a better father than Rory Pond, who would rather go for vacation on Apalapucia than take his baby daughter away from a bunch of terrorists who are brainwashing her to become a human weapon…

    Hey, I just saw the similarity between River Song and River Tam: both girls were brainwashed to become human weapons. But River Tam had someone who loved and saved her (Simon). River Song didn’t.

  47. Cassandra Davis says

    Oh, someone already took Katara? (Also, hooray for the person who thought of Cordelia). Anyway,

    1) Cimorene, from “Talking to Dragons” and the rest of the series. Swordfighting, magic, investigating skills, a possible alliance with dragons, and I think we could get along.

    2)Daine, from Tamora Pierce’s Immortals series. She’s kept armies from being able to go into battle in the first place, she’s a shapeshifter and a wild mage, and she’s also personally an awesome person.

    3) I’m ridiculously tempted to want to take Azula, also from Avatar. Which would be a terrible idea, because she’s the villain, but if for whatever reason we’re on the same side- she’d be a very *effective* ally.

  48. Anna M says

    1) Xena-That one is pretty obvious.
    2) Elektra-ninja assassin who would come in handy in a fight.
    3) She-Hulk-Green, strong, fun-what’s not to love?

  49. Gabriella says

    Acid Queen,

    Yeah, fair enough, I can see that logic. I didn’t like them much when they first came out – I was a teenager, so I suspect I was the target demographic – but I reread them all when the movie came out. You have to overlook, as you said, the whole ‘yellow peril’ mentality (I was reading an article which basically refuted any plausibility of it actually happening as, at best, poetic licence and at worse scaremongering – I can dig it up if you’re interested) but I really loved the characterisations. I thought Ellie was a plausible character and I liked her friendships with the other girls (and to a lesser extent Homer, though her relationship with Lee was problematic, especially in the Ellie Chronicals) and how Robyn and Fi grow and adapt as they’re thrust into circumstacnes they weren’t raised for.

  50. Crass says

    1) Dana Scully – a crack shot and a medical doctor who could save your life in a pinch. She’s also brave and resourceful enough to rescue you from the Arctic Circle.
    2) Cordelia Naismith Vorkosigan. Tough, compassionate, takes no shit from anyone.
    3) Buffy Summers – super-strength and quick with the wise-cracks. Would also benefit from a bit of motherly tough love from Cordelia.

  51. Cloudtigress says

    My three:

    1. The ‘artificial’ human Catlin from C.J. Cherryh’s Cyteen series (alright, only two books so far, but still…). Has been trained almost from birth to know guns and knives and other sneaky ways to kill/disable someone, and is good at observing targets.

    2. Lan Fan from Fullmetal Alchemist. Has the usual (fictional) ninja skills, plus can sense the lifeforce of others in her vicinity, useful when fighting someone in total darkness.

    3. Tomoe Ame from Stan Sakai’s Usagi Yojimbo comic. A very good samurai swordswoman, and a good battle tactician and adviser.

    Looking over my choices, I’ve got bodyguards who are trained to be such, with two of them older teens (1 & 2). Not sure what that says about this group, though.

  52. cy says

    Anita Blake would be my first choice, from the Anita Blake novel series. Anita is not only good in a fight with humans, but what with being a Vampire Executioner and all, she pretty good with supernatural predator types.

    And Captain Kara “Starbuck” Thrace from Battletar Galactica and Xena, Princess Warrior jumped to mind first.

    Love all these tough girls.

  53. Robin says

    Late to the party, so most of my obvious choices have already been mentioned. :) I’ll try to add a few new names to the list.

    * Sarah Walker from Chuck — I’m surprised no one’s picked her yet, especially after the most recent episode. She’s skilled in hand-to-hand, firearms, throwing weapons, and infiltration.

    * Maya from the Fourth Realm trilogy by John Twelve Hawks — Not the most personable gal, but she’s been trained in combat and evasion since birth. Where Sarah is confrontational, Maya can find or create an exit strategy and a hiding place to regroup in a heartbeat.

    * Kahlan Amnell from Legend of the Seeker — She might look like a typical fantasy priestess, but the Mother Confessor is no pushover. She’s handy with bladed weapons, hand-to-hand, and when all else fails, she can use her mojo to turn enemies to her own side.

    Honorable mentions — Parker from Leverage for her martial arts, sneakiness, and taser skills; Jo Lupo from Eureka, an Army Ranger with access to cutting edge weaponry; Claudia Donovan and/or H.G. Wells from Warehouse 13 if there’s hacking or MacGyvering to be done.

  54. Casey says

    I can’t really think of three specific ones but I’d love to have the Kiyoshi warriors from Avatar: The Last Airbender to protect me. 😀

  55. Tchang says

    1) The Major. – Ghost in the Shell — manga, not anime

    2) Katara – Avatar the Last Airbender, season 3

    3) Khu Lon – Ranma 1/2

    I would hope to be adopted as a protege by Khu Lon, and all three of these amazing ladies are strong, smart and dauntless.

  56. Z says

    Xena – She IS the warrior princess.
    Counselo Deanna Troi – has martial arts skillz and, she’s an empath.
    Wendy O. Williams – the HEAVIEST woman in metal will mow you down with an exploding school bus

  57. Maddy says

    Latest but far from least, because:

    1- Honor Harrington! (I can’t believe she’s not been picked yet! More for me!) Coup de vitesse master, a hell of a markswoman and working diligently on her swordsmanship. Years of experience in a body vital enough (thanks to prolong) to make the most of it. She’s also a superb strategist and tactician.
    (See also Iris Babcock. The Honorverse has such fantastic strong female characters.)

    2- Jane Sagan (from the Old Man’s War universe). Ex-Ghost Brigade. Hardass even in a human body. Lethally competent.

    3- Anna Cornick-Latham (from the Alpha and Omega series). “Zen” werewolf – protective instincts, calming influence on others, lethal if necessary. She can also see or feel magic (sometimes).
    (Hell, most of Patricia Briggs’ characters are kick-ass. Mercy Thompson with the gun wielding and her Shi Sei Kai Kan karate; Rialla and Shamera from the Sianim books…)

    Honorable mentions:
    Hailing from the Mageworlds books – Klea Santreny, Chaka, ladies Bindweed and Blossom as well as Beka Rosselin-Metadi!
    Also, did no Vorkosigan Saga fans think of Taura? (BTW, hi and yes! for Cordelia Naismith.)

  58. Gabriella says

    A friend just pointed out: The Bride from Kill Bill – hell, EVERY woman from those movies – and Lara Croft. Screw bodygaurds, ladies, we have an ARMY here. Or at least a militia :p

  59. Red says

    Ah, how’d I miss this topic?!

    But here are my choices:

    Arcee from ‘Transformers: Prime’. She’s the Autobot’s second-in-command, fearless, can turn into a motorcycle for fast getaways and is is wonderfully snarky.

    Katara from’Avatar; The Last Airbender’. She’s a healer, responsible, nurturing (though a little smothering) and resourceful.

    Luna Lovegood from the Harry Potter series; she’s just olain FUN to be around. She’s also extremely loyal, caring and great in a fight. She would add zing to the group with her off-kilter remarks and generally calm presence.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *