Every time I come across Never Been Kissed on TV, I have this compulsion to watch it. I know it’s a terrible movie full of bad messages and terrible stereotypes. The ugly duckling turns into a swan story. The smart people are nerds and socially shunned but are ultimately the victors trope. The one true love schmaltz. The unbearable whiteness of being. It’s awful. It’s a terrible movie. In case you missed it, let me throw in one more terrible.
And I love, love, love it.
THL readers, I need some reassurances that I’m not the only one with this kind of dirty secret*. Do you have any movies or shows** that break your “ism” rules, but you love them anyway? Do you attempt to justify the love by finding excuses, or do you enjoy your crapfest, no holds barred?
*you already know my biggest dirty secret: Supernatural. 
ETA: **or any media, really. Confession: I did not mean to hit publish on this post. LOL.
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My dirty secret feels so dirty and so thoroughly awful I’m loath to admit to them… they’re not even GOOD films. Transformers 1 and Road Trip. I kid you not.
I HATE Michael Bay AND I want to see Transformers again. I thought Shia was handsome, and it was shiny and smooth and the running and the muscles… yeah. I liked it, even after M.Fox’s character said “It’s your carburettor” and I knew she *couldn’t even see* the carburettor and I said it out loud in the cinema. But I suspect I’ll get over it soon because my eyes hurt from rolling at all the testicle jokes.
And Road Trip! I mean! How big is my blind spot for that film??!! But I really enjoyed it, even though it’s offends [insert any group routinely buggered in white-boy films] and promotes awful college habits. AND I laughed. *shame*
Alison(Quote) (Reply)
Alison,
Oh yes, Transformers and Independence Day are two on my guilt list. Every single time I happen across them, I am stuck watching to the end. The “world” (read: Amuuurica) battling technologically superior alien beings and winning!
sbg(Quote) (Reply)
I love the Van Helsing movie. It’s terrible and I adore it. And Supernatural, of course. Oh, and not a film, but the Bayonetta video game is so over-the-top sexist and objectifying – I try to defend it by pretending it’s an intentional parody of stereotypical feminine sexuality – and I love it. It careens so far around the bend of ridiculous, yet remains awesome to me.
The Twilight movies. I watch them religiously and enjoy it. Strong female characters? Who cares? Pretty people! (I have the biggest crush on Kristen Stewart.)
DM(Quote) (Reply)
DM,
Oh, the Van Helsing movie. The naked vampire brides in that movie helped me realize I was bisexual. *happy sigh* I watched it later as an adult, and gawd it’s a terrible movie. But I love it still.
Sylvia Sybil(Quote) (Reply)
Sylvia Sybil, and
DM, after my Grandaddy passed away I had insomnia for about a month, so every night I would spend on the couch in my dorm suite’s common room watching Van Helsing. Hugh Jackman will distract you from all your woes, oh yes he does precioussss…. Even with the terrible script….
Ahem. Yes. “America’s Sweethearts” is a silly rom com that I watch at least monthly. Catherine Zeta Jones is a vapid bitch and Julia Roberts is the sweet sister who wins the boy in the end. On the plus side the dialogue is incredibly clever, so I enjoy it.
My favorite film of all time is “Jurassic Park.” Also my favorite book. Shut up.
Megan(Quote) (Reply)
Not so much with movies, but I have more than a few comic habits that make it hard to look my reflection in the eye. I loved the Please Save My Earth manga. And felt horrible for loving it. My god. The main romance is so creepy and dub-con and wtf and by all rights I should want the male lead to die in a fire. WHY DO I NOT WANT THE MALE LEAD TO DIE IN A FIRE?! What is WRONG with me?! But it’s pretty! But he’s an asshole! But it’s poignant! But he’s an ASSHOLE! But it’s soooo romantic and epic and beautiful and tragic! BUT HE’S AN ASSHOLE! *sob*
And then of course there’s the sexism/othering/objectification/consent-issues from, oh, just about every Yaoi manga I’ve ever read…. >_>
Dani Atkinson(Quote) (Reply)
Another Van Helsing fan.
Not only is it worth almost anything to be able to watch Hugh Jackman for two hours, but I love the fact that Friar Dweeby (played by a wonderful Dave Wenham) got laid while studly Van Helsing never did, hee!
Angie
Angie(Quote) (Reply)
Dani Atkinson,
Is the male lead in Please Save My Earth as bad as the male leads in Hot Gimmick and Black Bird? ‘Cuz I could understand being ashamed of liking something like that.
I can’t really name off specific stuff right now ‘cuz it’s 2 am but jeez…I think pretty much everything I like counts as a guilty pleasure.
So…almost every old movie on TCM, most all horror/slasher/exploitation films, most pro-wrestling promotions, VH1 Celebreality shows and every hentai, yuri and yaoi manga I ever read (to say nothing of regular old manga!).
Casey(Quote) (Reply)
Do you attempt to justify the love by finding excuses, or do you enjoy your crapfest, no holds barred?
I’d be interested in everyone’s answer to this. I definitely have guilty pleasure stuff, but am struggling to think of the best examples just now. However, I will say I believe in enjoying stuff despite its flaws, because otherwise there would have been absolutely no way for me to enjoy TV or movies at all until… the late 90s, maybe? And I don’t make excuses or try to rationalize the isms away. I just acknowledge that it’s got problems, but it’s also got good stuff, and focus on the positive.
Jennifer Kesler(Quote) (Reply)
Transformers. Totally. The cartoon Transformers was my favorite – other than Voltron. I love big robots and adore Optimus Prime, I’m loathe to admit that the first time I saw Optimus up on the big, big screen, I think I teared up a bit.) And, yes, I despise, despise, despise Michael Bay – especially every time I watch Transformers.
Elektra. I know, I know. It was so universally panned and horrible. But, I can’t help it. I kinda liked the relationship btw her and the girl. It made me wish for the sister I never had. The doctor from ER was just there as Her arm candy. For once. Also, I have wanna-be assassin wish-fullfillment issues, especially since I found out I’m a crack shot with a crossbow completely by chance at a fair.
eviltwit(Quote) (Reply)
p.s. also, Airwolf and Manimal.
eviltwit(Quote) (Reply)
“Do you attempt to justify the love by finding excuses, or do you enjoy your crapfest, no holds barred?”
Oh, definitely the latter. I enjoy Penn & Teller’s Bullshit, even though half the time I don’t agree with them, or find their arguments flawed or poor (The War on Porn episode a glowing example — and I’m pretty porn-positive).
DNi(Quote) (Reply)
More sort of…ignore the flaws as hard as I can. Like a dog not-looking at the mess on the carpet. I know they’re there, but there’s all the shiny over here!
Sylvia Sybil(Quote) (Reply)
I don’t have any guilty pleasure movies – well, maybe the Mummy Returns – but the Vampire Diaries might count as something of guilty pleasure TV series.
SunlessNick(Quote) (Reply)
Disney movies are my guilty pleasure. They’re so sexist and racist and generally every -ist, but I can’t help loving them (and singing along *g*). Except for Beauty & The Beast – that Stockholm Syndrome is way too creepy for my taste.
But I am very able to ignore the flaws of Aladdin, Mulan, The Little Mermaid, Enchanted, Hercules,…
M.C.(Quote) (Reply)
Jennifer Kesler,
Well, yeah, and had I actually meant to post this, I think I would have tried to clarify that I am talking about the worst of the worst. The secret love for Kindergarten Cop, even after Arnold made officially public his assholishness.
NGL, if I could get a job in Astoria, Oregon, I would move there because of this movie. And The Goonies.
sbg(Quote) (Reply)
Hellboy II: The Golden Army. I should loathe that Malfoy Elf Prince. But he’s so *pretty*, especially when he does that rolling thunder thing through the King’s guards. Mmmm….
Sorry, you were saying?
Jean Lamb(Quote) (Reply)
“Earth Girls are Easy.” My best friend and I watched it so many times, starting in college, and it is just so mindlessly silly. “Big Trouble in Little China.” Disney films, of course. And I love historical and fantasy films, and will put up with a perfectly ridiculous plot if I get enough costume porn (hairstyles count, too). And add me to the list of those who guiltily watch Van Helsing; the CGI Mr. Hyde is an especially nice touch!
Kimberly B.(Quote) (Reply)
OH SO MANY. As a young teenager, I was a keen horror fan…’nuff said. Horrible cheesy slasher movies, anything with an oversized creature that chomps on scantily-clad women – I can’t resist them. They’re so insulting; but, of course, the very fact that they objectify women so terribly might be the reason I loved them so much as a closeted teen…
More recently, Crank 2: High Voltage – so ridiculously OTT racist/sexist/etc. that it’s actually a parody of these tropes in action movies. I think. Lo, I think I might be justifying.
Rainicorn(Quote) (Reply)
If I love a movie, I love it. I may be baffled by my love due to overt -isms…..but sometimes I just can’t help myself.
Stargate (the original film) is so freaking racist and sexist that it boggles the mind. Does that stop me from constantly watching it? No. Can I articulate my willingness to forgive such -isms in this film when I won’t even stay in the house when the roomies break out My Super Ex Girlfriend? Nope. It’s just the way it is.
America’s Sweethearts, btw, is one of the 4 total “chick flicks” that I’ve been able to sit all the way through (others: Practical Magic, Charms for the Easy Life, Kill Me Later), which as far as I am concerned makes it a shining example for the rest of the genre.
draconismoi(Quote) (Reply)
A whole crapload of games that objectify women. Tomb Raider is probably #1, since I have loved that series since it started back in the 90′s. Right now, my new thing is League of Legends, where women go out into the battle arena wearing lingerie. Sigh.
No, I don’t try to justify them. I would like them all a whole lot more if it wasn’t for the sexism, but I grit my teeth through the sexism to get to the good stuff.
Ida(Quote) (Reply)
“While You Were Sleeping”. So many things wrong with the ethics in that movie, and yet I cannot look away.
tiffanized(Quote) (Reply)
I can’t call Van Helsing, The Mummy Returns, GI Joe: Rise of Cobra, or any other Stephen Sommers film a guilty pleasure because I feel no guilt whatsoever at loving them. They are films filled with the glee of a kid who just got a bunch of awesome toys to play with.
Many merchandise-driven cartoons of the 80s, like GI Joe or He-Man and the Masters of the Universe. So very cheesy and weird, but I grew up with them and cannot deny them.
I love the work of David and Leigh Eddings despite the massive amounts of gender and racial essentialism.
Robert E. Howard and H.P. Lovecraft were horribly racist even for their time, but damn they could write.
“The Truth About Cats and Dogs” utterly fails with work with its underlying message, but Janeane Garofalo and Uma Thurman are so funny in it that I don’t care.
“The Craft” has all kinds of issues to it, and I can’t really find any way to defend it except that it has Robin Tunney in a Catholic Schoolgirl uniform.
Patrick McGraw(Quote) (Reply)
I am quite able to turn it all off and enjoy my guilty pleasures, if I couldn’t I would probably go crazy. I’m going to leave out TV shows & just go movies. I loathe Michael Bay, mentioned by several here, for so many reasons, but if “the Rock” is on I have to watch. I’ll happily watch the original Transformers cartoons if I can find them, but I found the first film ‘meh’ in large part because the action is so fast you can’t truly appreciate the robot effects & the Witwicky stuff was just painful. (josh duhamel though is yummy). I really enjoy action/adventure films but I find the swish-pans & ultra-fast effects to be disorienting the older I get. Why go to all the trouble of creating such awesome, real looking robots & then shoot action sequences so fast that only the occasional slo-mo lets you appreciate the pretty. Though the voice of Optimus Prime in the film gives me the shivers in a good way.
I have a whole list of movies that trigger me, if they are on TV & I flip past I must watch even if I already own it on DVD. I call them my Pavlov movies: While you Were Sleeping, Simply Irresistible, Return to Me, Practical Magic (i love SB in this), Sleepless in Seattle, You’ve Got Mail, The Mummy, The Mummy Returns, National Treasure & National Treasure: book of secrets. Way too many movies.
KLee(Quote) (Reply)
sbg,
Well Independence Day is really just one long argument for the superiority of American values, leadership and invention. Right down to the modern families and apple pie in the form of an Apple computer that can interact with and infect alien computers!
KLee(Quote) (Reply)
Supernatural, for me. Not a movie, but my only real big guilty pleasure, and ZOMGFAILCONTAINERSHIP in its badness.
I’ve toyed with the ideas of re-writing some of Lovecraft’s greatest works, to take the racism out. I think it can be done, and the stories wouldn’t be the worse for it.
CaitieCat(Quote) (Reply)
The Saw movies – if pushed for an answer, I’ll tell you it’s out of peverse curiosity as to how far they can retcon the backstory. Book-wise, anything by Philippa Gregory, particularly her Wideacre trilogy. The book was atrocious, but I was hooked enough to read both sequels.
Gabriella(Quote) (Reply)
I’m still on the second season, so I can only imagine how far it has to go from there.
I’ve toyed with the ideas of re-writing some of Lovecraft’s greatest works, to take the racism out.I think it can be done, and the stories wouldn’t be the worse for it.
It would vary from story to story. There are plenty where racism doesn’t enter into things at all (like “The Whisperer in Darkness”) and others where it is inextricable from the story (like “The Horror At Red Hook,” which can be summed up as “I am living in New York and I am surrounded by people who are Not Like Me and it is Intolerable!”).
Patrick McGraw(Quote) (Reply)
Patrick McGraw,
S2 of SPN = Glory Days. For reals.
Also, I cannot help but bust a move when I hear Sir Mix-A-Lot. *hangs head*
sbg(Quote) (Reply)
I second Stargate the movie! Lord have mercy. The series had some race and sexism issues, too, but it had more good points to balance them out.
I also liked Kindergarten Cop, and it made me think of moving to Astoria! Wonder if it was actually produced just to get more tourists to that area? j/k
Fight Club is one of mine. I know it’s got huge, massively sexist issues, but while he’s addressing the men of Gen X, I’m just so not seeing how that all doesn’t apply to me, too, you know? So years ago I wrote about the way *I* saw the movie, and somehow MRAs latched onto those posts and thought I was saying something else entirely *shakes head*. But I don’t try to justify it in my own brain – it is what it is, but if I can connect with it even though the very thought would probably baffle the creators, good for me.
Like the people in this thread who love Disney despite the flaws, I also love some animated series that… well, they’re not always rolling in blatant sexism, but they follow the usual formula where all the characters are male unless they need females as mothers or love interests – which is especially harmful in stuff aimed at kids, because it teaches them that males are people, and females are accessories to males. It sometimes crosses my mind when I’m laughing my ass off at Shaun the Sheep that if I reviewed it here, I’d have to be critical (especially of the handling of Shirley in S1, a big fat ewe who basically eats nonstop and is oblivious to everything else – she gets better in S2, though). So… I don’t plan on reviewing it. Partly because it’s not that helpful to point out every single show that follows that formula when we all know it’s a bum formula, but most because I’m being a hypocrite who just finds that show way too funny to spoil with critique! (OMG, Bagpipe Buddy…)
Jennifer Kesler(Quote) (Reply)
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