I Need a Drink

Ah, those words spoken by people who are stressed out: I need a drink. That’s been me, in a nutshell, all summer so far. My drink of choice tends to be a vodka lemonade or vodka sour. Want to know which brand I won’t be drinking? This one:

Want to know why? Because I am not invited. Ketel One vodka is apparently for white men only. Women are only in these ads to either look approvingly at the Boys Club:

Or take their cab, because those men in the rain are so darned chivalrous (or the women so darned sneaky):

I suppose it makes me terribly naive to keep waiting for a booze ad marketed toward women. So far, I can only recall seeing women in ads for light beer, in party settings and/or as some object for the men to ogle (because men are the target audience). It’s like the whole industry doesn’t believe women drink or something, or maybe they think a woman shouldn’t drink anything but bright pink Cosmopolitans (as long as they’re not mixed with Ketel One).

BRB, I have to go mix myself a frilly cocktail ala Sex and the City and talk about shoes and men. Because standing for something stands for something. Or whatever.

Comments

  1. Charles RB says

    There is a STRONG disconnect in an ad saying “there was a time when MEN were MEN and independent and did their own thing” while selling us a brand. (That and talking about men doing what they want BUT DRINK RESPONSIBLY GUYS!!)

  2. Robin says

    Oy. I’m glad that Ed Quinn is getting work post-Eureka, and I do like the fancy clothes the people in the ad are wearing, but that’s just rude. If they really want to be old-fashioned “gentlemen”, they should buy a round for the women, too.

    Or, y’know the women could buy their own. It wouldn’t be nearly so insulting / exclusionary if they were marketing to both sexes. Where’s the group of attractive women out on the town with a Lauren-Bacall-esque voiceover?

    (On a completely non-gender-based note: Who the heck drinks straight vodka? I don’t care how well it’s distilled and filtered, it still tastes like nail polisher remover. Yuck.)

  3. sbg says

    I came this close to awarding two forgiveness points, one for use of BRMC’s Spread Your Love and one for Ed Quinn because he is HAWT despite being in this commercial series.

    Where’s the group of attractive women out on the town with a Lauren-Bacall-esque voiceover?

    Take out the “attractive” (it’s a pipe dream, I know) and I’d totally get behind this. I know they’ll never market 90% of product without using attractive people. Goodness knows ugly people are only good for laughs.

  4. sbg says

    There was a time when substance was overrated in favor of a svelte body, when women were moved about by the constant cur of the crowd and groping hands, when they could only drink alcohol that was pink in color, came with an umbrella and was purchased by some manly stud. There was a time when women were window dressings. Ladies, that was last night.

    And don’t you forget it.

  5. Genevieve says

    On a completely non-gender-based note: Who the heck drinks straight vodka? I don’t care how well it’s distilled and filtered, it still tastes like nail polisher remover. Yuck.

    Agreed. A few months ago I was about to do a poetry reading, and to calm my nerves I decided to take a shot of straight vodka. Not a good idea, tasted awful. Though it did motivate me to then order a much-better-tasting rum and coke, thereby making me even more ‘relaxed.’

  6. Scarlett says

    Completely unrelated, but I can only semi-disagree on the straight vodka thing. The stuff you can get in Australia, even the so-called ‘Russian imports’, absolutely disgusting straight. But what I would give for straight-up icy-cold real Polish vodka…

  7. says

    Real Polish Vodka is the best.

    I have nothing intelligent to say on topic.
    (Other than I found SBG’s last comment both funny and terribly sad.)

  8. Scarlett says

    I stayed in Poland for a month and, OMG, the quality of Vodka they had for half the price of the most expensive stuff you can get is Aus…

    OK, will be quiet about the vodka… (And pinch my brother’s headphones later so I can watch the clip and add something other then I miss Polish Vodka :p)

  9. Scarlett says

    What struck me is the point they’re making that ‘real men drink vodka’. Almost all the vodka-drinkers I know are women. (I’ve watched several women arrive with a bottle of vodka and several liters of their preferred mixer and work their way through both by the end of the night.) Is their point to say that ‘real men drink vodka STRAIGHT’? In which case, they’re bloody stupid, because vodka that isn’t made in Eastern Europe (pref Poland or Russia) is disgusting straight… and how is that a sign of suave sophistication?

  10. sbg says

    What struck me is the point they’re making that ‘real men drink vodka’. Almost all the vodka-drinkers I know are women.

    This is because those other vodka brands apparently package their product in “delicately painted perfume bottles.” Someone turned vodka into a girl’s drink, and it’s time for the men to reclaim this liquor.

  11. says

    I think I need a drink of my favorite Pinot Grigio, now. Barefoot. (that’s the brand, and it has a really cute footprint logo on the label!)

  12. the OTHER Maria says

    :headtilt:

    The only way this ad makes sense is if they think the blatant sexism will force me to drink their vodka.

  13. Scarlett says

    This is because those other vodka brands apparently package their product in “delicately painted perfume bottles.”

    Do they really have that in the US? Apart from RTDs, which are coloured to represent the flavour (green for apple, red for raspberry, pink for guava etc) all the vodka brands I can think of have clear bottles. With the exception of the flavoured Absolute line, they colour the bottles to represent the flavours, too.

  14. Scarlett says

    Whoops, didn’t use the right code there. The first par is a quote from sbg and the second is my reply.

  15. sbg says

    I don’t know, Scarlett. I don’t actually drink much myself (heh), at least not enough to know the difference. I was using the language the ad-makers used.

  16. Scarlett says

    Ah, OK. I was actually tempted to detour to my local bottle shop to see if i was right, but from memory, the bottles tend to be clear with some kind of coloured writing – Smirnoff and Stolichnya are red, Absolute and Finlandia are blue, Smirnoff Black is, well, what do you know, BLACK etc – I can’t think of anything that comes in a pink bottle apart from RTD raspberry UDLs.

    I’m not sure if it makes it worse or not that they’re using something that doesn’t even exist to make fun of women.

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