Midweek Media (Lite): 3 Musketeers


Setting: a bustling city pavilion, mid day. A twentysomething white man wearing business casual attire complete with laptop bag walks down the street. A white woman pushing a stroller/pram sees him and says hello, giving him a long once-over, implying interest. The man looks puzzled and continues on a few steps. Three women, one black, two white sit on a concrete bench, all dressed in business wear.

Woman one says, “Look, the new one.” and whistles the traditional “cat call”, while woman two says, “Mmm, I’d like to unwrap that.” and woman three says, “Must be something tasty.” (note: couldn’t quite catch what she said, so that might be wrong.) All three women are giving the man lascivious looks. The man turns and says, with a confused smile, “Excuse me?” Woman one bites the air and kind of growls, says, “Bring it to momma.”

The man spreads his arms out, like he’s presenting himself. We see he’s holding a 3 Musketeers candy bar in his left hand, and it proceeds to float out of his hand into the air. “Get it!” one of the women says, and they all lunge for the candy bar. The man looks on as woman three gets it, his face showing dawning recognition.

Voiceover says: It’s even more irresistable.

Woman three, with her mouth full, points a finger at her face and says, “It’s so good.” Cue the candy-bar-in-a-sea-of-chocolate scene and the voiceover continues: 3 Musketeers now has more chocolate taste than before. Cut to the man who had his candy bar robbed exiting a convenience store with a new bar, bumping into a woman and clutching the candy closer to him to avoid a repeat theft. She says, “Hi! Whoop!” as he jerks.

Cut to a floating 3 Musketeers with “A lighter way to enjoy chocolate” below it (the “lighter” starts to float) and the final voiceover: 3 Musketeers, now with a new richer chocolate taste.

I have thoughts, some good, some bad. Do you?


  1. sbg says

    1) Street harassment is never okay, even with a nifty role reversal.
    2) Oh, haha, wait, it’s not harassment – it’s just those wimmenfolk and their overriding love and we’ll-do-anything need for chocolate!

  2. tiffanized says

    Another chocolate = sex commercial. That being openly sexual is not okay for women so women must resort to expressing their “lust for chocolate” instead.

    That seeing women harass a man for laughs doesn’t level the playing field at all but instead seems to make the divide that much more devastating. And that the man’s response to the harassment was sort of “come and get it” as though that is the appropriate or reasonable response.

  3. says

    I have two thoughts: one, the sexualization of chocolate resulting from society’s oppression and denial of women’s sexuality, leading them to subsume their desires in food and causing the wide spread eating disorder epidemic. (Hey, if I was an alien anthropologist studying our television waves, that would be my theory.) Two, the catfight between the women over the chocolate. Don’t forget, women are all catty bitches who will turn on each other over something as minor as a chocolate bar!

    I’d love to hear your positive thoughts because I don’t see anything.

  4. sbg says


    See, now that I could have gotten behind.

    Instead, more of the same “this is the dieter-friendly chocolate bar” nonsense with bonus stereotypes.

  5. Casey says

    Upon re-watching this on TV an hour or two ago, the thing that irks me most is the guy’s head drooping in dejection/disappointment when he realizes “Oh, they don’t want to ravage me, they just wanna eat my candy bar”…WHAT THE HELL MESSAGE ARE YOU TRYING TO SEND WITH THAT, YOU ASSHOLES!?

  6. says

    wtf is diet chocolate. do women seriously eat “lite” chocolate? geez. what’s the point? where’s the joy? they can’t even allow us to eat friggin chocolate. [I’m a Lindt girl myself.]

    i FF through all commercials. it saves me the grief of pointless yelling at the tv.

  7. says


    I know some women who eat diet chocolate when they’re trying to lose weight. Apparently they’re made with some fake sweetener that acts as a laxative if you eat more than one or two servings in 24 hours; I’m not sure if this is supposed to be a bug or a feature.

    I think “diet candy” is ridiculous, but that’s more of a problem I have with the diet industry and paying 300% for the “lite” version of a product than it is with those women who are struggling to lose weight and still get some enjoyment out of life in the meantime.

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