Midweek Media, Of a Sort

This isn’t a complete breakdown of media images or messages, more of a collection of seriously ooky shit that companies and their advertising agencies think we should find soooooo compelling we have seemingly inexplicable urges to eat, purchase, patronize or otherwise give them our hard earned dollars.

I might be tetchy from a headache that will not go away for more than a day at a time and dealing with massive amounts of work stupid, or these commercials might be horrendous.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qE7G5p2xbHI

Carl’s Jr. Not much needs to be said that hasn’t already been, as everyone knows that Carl’s Jr. is a hotbed for horrendously offensive advertisements, and it seems now they’re branching out their odious commercials to regions that know Carl’s Jr. as Hardee’s (which never played into meat = sex = woman bullshit that I can remember from when I lived in the heartland). If you’re really a masochist, you can check out the director’s cut.

As an aside, if someone has an inflammation, I’m pretty sure no doctor or alternative naturopathic practitioner in the world will prescribe writhing around in sexually charged poses with a Carl’s Jr. burger as a cure. There are ointments that will work so much better and also won’t give you indigestion.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=auZgAcQbTLw&feature=related

This Fiat ad was apparently one of the bestest Superbowl ads this year. Nothing says “buy a car” like a hipster geek gawking at a woman, the woman noticing and becoming irritated/offended at first but quickly flipping into some weird, sexual foreplay before poofing into an ugly car. I find that the woman doesn’t speak in a language many USians can understand, rendering her exotic on top of plain old hot, really gross, too, as well as the coffee foam that looks an awful lot like something else dripping onto her chest. Seriously, not subtle with that innuendo.

Not buying a Fiat even if I have to walk everywhere as the only alternative.

I really, honestly cannot believe this ad still airs. I know it’s already been covered here, but IT’S STILL BEING SHOWN. I just don’t know how a ten calorie beverage is believably more “manly” than a zero calorie beverage, but then I don’t know how anyone thinks women don’t like going to action flicks simply to watch shit blow up. I don’t watch Transformers every time it’s played on TV because of the plot, Megan Fox or Shia LeBeouf. I also don’t watch it because my boyfriend wants to, because I don’t have a boyfriend.

But apparently I’m an anomaly. I know the drill.

Comments

  1. Dani says

    I’m at least spared the Carl’s Jr. commercials, but see the other two all the time. Both commercials make me mad, but the Dr. Pepper one reminds me that I actually know people who hold the view perpetuated in that ad (which makes me the weird one in social situations, considering that I frequently geek out over well-done fight scenes), which just makes it worse.

  2. sbg says

    Dani,

    Well, everyone knows that women like movies about shoes and kittens. Possibly rainbows. But never, ever anything involving fight scenes, badass weapons and plots so threadbare you can see right through them and it’s all good, because the better to enjoy the pretty pyrotechnics.

  3. Nialla says

    That Dr. Pepper commercial always leaves me baffled. Way to slam half the US population, brilliant ad team!

  4. Ara says

    sbg,

    That’s more or less why I watch MacGyver via Netflix; there’s lots of stuff blowing up! (And the plotlines are actually kind of painful in some episodes, though I’m told that gets better after the first season.)

  5. QuantumSparkle says

    Ugh. It’s Hardee’s where I am, but that hasn’t stopped them from showing their sexist-garbage commercials here for years. The soapy Paris Hilton one broadcast here, and so did the “Miss Turkey =a turkey burger” one. *blegh* Oh, there was even one where the entire commercial was just scantily-clad woman rolled across the screen holding a burger. Yeah, because nothing makes me want to eat a burger more than blatant objectification. /sarcasm

    It irks me that these commercials are so awful and offensive that I wind up remembering them. At least I can always remember where not to go for a burger :)

    PS: Since this is my first post here, I thought I should mention that I’ve been silently enjoying your site for a few months. Great blog!

  6. Nialla says

    I don’t understand the whole “manly” thing because it has ~9 more calories than regular Diet Dr. Pepper. Do those calories make hair grow on your chest, so that’s why it’s for men only?

    That ad makes me glad I don’t drink any type of Dr. Pepper. Something in it doesn’t agree with me and hasn’t for years. My mother loves Diet Dr. Pepper, but did try this “manly” version once, unaware of the ads, and didn’t like it because it messed up her blood sugar (she’s diabetic).

  7. Daydreamer says

    I was having lunch with a group of guys when that Dr. Pepper 10 ad came on the bar’s TV set. We all agreed it was a terrible ad and none of us could understand why it was made. (Interestingly, this morning I saw a woman in my chemistry class who had a bottle of the stuff with her. So take that, whoever made that commercial.)

    My mother is the most enthusiastic fan of action movies I know. I remember when I first saw the trailer for RED; I thought to myself, “Good heavens, some movie producer made a list of everything Mom wants to see in a movie, and filmed it.”

  8. Quib says

    Since hulu’s been showing me a new “I’m a pepper” commercial, I was hopin’ maybe they were done with their “NO Gurlz alowd!” commercial.

    Why is frumpy-Brett Favre supposed to be the guy everyone wants to be like? On close inspection, he’s not even actually out of shape and in his mid fifties, he’s just dressed to look that way. Who are they targeting, that they think are excited for khaki pants, and golf carts in the jungle?

  9. Juliana says

    That stupid Carl’s Jr commercial airs all the time where I am. Every time it comes on I just want to mute the tv till it’s over.

    And “Dr. Pepper ten, it’s not for women?” That’s… I mean, even if it wasn’t terribly sexist, how much sense does it make to say “hey, 50 percent of the population–don’t buy our sodas!”

  10. Ara says

    I asked my boyfriend why having ten calories is supposed to make it more manly and he said he didn’t know and thought the ad was silly. (Though he’s hardly a typical American mainstream guy.) So they’re possibly not even convincing their target audience…

  11. says

    Hadn’t seen the Carl’s Jr. one. Now I’m wishing I still hadn’t.

    Saw the Fiat one, wanted to throw something through my television screen.

    Dr. Pepper one actually got a laugh; it came on the other night, and my seven year old daughter says (in the deadpan, matter-of-fact voice she uses when correcting my wife and I): “That is NOT correct”.

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