Trojan commercial suggests “pigs” should evolve

As much as we complain here about ads using pretty ladies and promises of sex to sell products to men, I’m prepared to make an exception in the case of the “Evolve” commercial from Trojan. I mean, condoms… sex… there is a certain logic here. And for once, young men are exactly the right target audience.

It takes place in a bar. Attractive women are sitting around on dates… with pigs. The pigs yap away at the women as music plays over the whole thing. The women look disinterested - the pigs aren’t scoring tonight.

Finally, one of the pigs goes off to the restroom and buys a Trojan out of the condom dispenser. Like something from a fairy tale, he’s instantly converted into an actual man. He returns to his date, who is suddenly interested in him. The screen goes black and the word “Evolve” appears over it. Followed by a second screen which advises “Use a condom every time.”

Damn straight. Yeah, it’s playing with sterotypes, but the message is sound (more on this later).

Now, of course the brainless masses at YouTube (where do they dig up that cesspool???) think this is a slam at all men. No, you morons, it is a slam at men who expect even casual dates to take care of all birth control issues for them, and at men who take advantage of the fact that the penetrator is less likely to contract an STD than is the penetrated partner. The only reason to fear this commercial is if you are too irresponsible and selfish to be having sex anyway. If that’s the case, you really do need to evolve or be eliminated from the gene pool via inability to get laid.

You should also note that the commercial features evolved women, or it wouldn’t work. There’s a distinct lack of female throwbacks who are willing to have condom-less sex because they’ve bought into the idea that sex is all about men achieving the most spontaneous and sensational orgasm of their lives. The women in the commercial are enlightened enough to know they will have more fun with sex if they have fewer worries, and condoms can help with that. Hopefully, women who have let men get by with this behavior are watching the commercial and thinking, “Yeah, I guess I do deserve some consideration.”

Having a Trojan in your pocket is obviously not going to make women throw themselves at you. I will say, however, that if a man refuses to have sex without using condoms, that tells me some attractive things about him. Not only that he is taking responsibility for his partner’s well-being and pleasure, but also tells me he respects himself. He doesn’t want to risk becoming a father and never knowing about it (or getting saddled with child support payments, quite possibly for a child he never gets to see). He doesn’t want to contract an STD and knows that even if he’s at less risk than his partners, it’s just silly not to do one simple thing to minimize the risk as much as possible. It also tells me he doesn’t have some retarded Neanderthal butch complex about only having sex the way animals do, with no forethought, planning or responsibility.

In short, it tells me he’s an evolved human being, capable of enjoying life without whining like a two-year-old every time responsibility and common sense demand a minor concession.

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