Huh. No where in that theme does it hint at SPACE PRIMITIVES ARE GONNA TAKE YOUR WOMEN, but hey, whatever. That’s pretty much what this episode is about, what with Chakotay all upset that “his” son is getting raised by Seska and with the major plot points getting driven home by Kes getting manhandled by some “primitive” aliens.
Okay, where we last left off, the crew of the Voyager had been summarily ejected from the ship because of the Kazon being greedy space pirate-primitives and Seska being all TRAITOR-IFFIC to a Federation crew she doesn’t give two snaps for ANYWAYS because she’s a CARDASSIAN DOUBLE AGENT. Also, she’s the only woman who’s had more than one sexual partner, lies to EVERYBODY, claims to be raped, and then LOLLERSKATES has a baby by the wrong man BY ACCIDENT. I guess bad women get punished by having to bear children by the wrong men? Because since she’s a Cardassian, she’d already had to steal and manipulate Chakotay’s DNA to get pregnant with HIS baby. Either the Kazon have super sperm or she got experimented on without her consent… either way, that’s gross.
I hear tell that Seska’s such a big bad in the series that even though she totally dies in this episode, her badness will REVERBERATE THROUGH TIME to get the crew in like s6. ….Is it bad I’m kinda thrilled by that? Like, I feel like gender politics in this show for conventionally attractive women are like a scene from How I Met Your Mother.
So, I’m kinda thrilled that at least the actress looks like she’s having fun being so bad. I kinda want her to eat someone’s brains.
Anyways, the Voyager crew are on a desert planet with a strange beast that eats people and some primitives so primitive that the Universal Translator can’t work with it. The Doctor and the resident “sociopath,” Lon Sudar, are the members of Star Fleet on the ship, so they start mucking about with the systems. This presents Sudor with a moral quandary, because since he really LIKES killing people, he’s afraid that if he lets his monster-side out too much, it’ll destroy him. Fortunately, he gets shot and dies, so, y’know, we don’t need to worry about exploring that.
Hooray! Everyone learns a thing or two about how friendship is magic.
Ha, you thought I was going to link to the NEW MLP, but I didn’t. I win! But seriously, I’d like to point out how Ember the pony all jumped off that cliff right there. This is similar to a lesson I learned from this ep: babies and small children inexplicably have near death experiences, by breathing “bad air” on strange new planets, jumping onto rocks surrounded by lava, or by getting mothered by EVIL WOMEN WHO LIE. I guess kids worlds over are the same. Anywho, Chakotay rescues a kid (not his, in case you were wondering!), everyone on the planet is happy, and then Paris comes and saves them.
Best Janeway moment: When Neelix starts to be all OMG I GOT SOMEONE KILLED and Janeway’s like, “THERE’S NO TIME TO WORRY ABOUT BLAME,” and starts telling her crew that not only are they not going to die, she’s ordering them to survive SO HARD they’re gonna eat bugs if they have to.