I’ve just read my 88 billionth article about how anorexia is on the rise. In the comments, I just read my 11 million billionth comment from guys saying, “But ladies, we like you at a healthy weight/little bit of padding/don’t want to see your ribs”, etc.
Are these guys trying to offer support? Maybe. But I think the reason it just doesn’t work is that it’s making women’s disordered eating habits all about the menz. And it’s not. I’ve rarely experienced fat shaming from males, and get equal amounts of dating offers at pretty much any weight, and yet I still feel like I am being looked down on, shunted to one side, not taken seriously and being judged because I’m not skinny. I feel like people assume I lack discipline because I’m not skinny, which is interesting because I get constant feedback about how I’m much too disciplined and need to relax more.
My feeling is that there’s just a sense that no matter what you’ve got going on in your brain, your heart or whatever, it does not count unless you’re also skinny. And what constitutes “skinny” is determined by a media which shrinks emaciated models just that special little bit more – and feels someone like Julia Roberts needs significant help from Photoshop. Heaven help us all.
What do you think causes women to feel such pressure to lose weight? Do men factor into your own feelings about your body some, a lot, not at all? How does it make you feel when men jump into these conversations to “reassure” you that they like curves? Also, do you feel it’s true they like curves? I don’t doubt that’s how they feel privately, but I’ve seen the teasing boys get from other boys if they date a “fat chick”, and it’s merciless. Talk about any aspect of this topic you want to talk about!